Maybe that’s a good thing
At least my ears won’t bleed
At least I will be spared
From 50% of the cheese

Lots of flags and tinsel
Patriotism abounds
Everyone is buzzing
Still got no bloody sound

Special effects
Dazzle on the stage
Happy, smiling people
But all I feel is rage

Still got no bloody sound
So singing to myself
Trying to lip read
And work the lyrics out

Tinkering with wires
Trying to fix this issue
But I’m no techno whiz
I could totally rip a tissue

Missing all the quips
By cheeky Graham Norton
Kind of kills the mood
My little fuse is shortened

Could just go to bed
But wired to the moon
My triple macchiato at 6
Was a really stupid move

Wtf – a gorilla?
But where’s the big drum kit?
I want to hear In The Air Tonight
If he’s wearing that, the twit

That said I’ve got no sound
So even if it played
I wouldn’t be able to hear it
I’m seriously dismayed