PlusNOT!

Plusnet I hate you!

You’re customer service is dire

You just tell me lies

I want to set you on fire!

I’m no arsonist

But it’s been nearly a month!

And still no flaming WiFi 

Now I’ve really got the hump

And I know all about humps

As I was recently on a camel

And through that I’ve learned to hiss and spit

And p**s like these unruly mammals

I’ve conquered sand dunes 

On the back of these beasts

And shall take you down too

If you persist giving me beef

Should’ve been last week

Now it’s going to be next

Stop moving the goal posts!

Can’t you see how I’m vexed?!

You say there’s a fault 

On my line

That YOU disconnected

Then CHARGED me a fine!

You won’t refund me 

Until it’s all been fixed

But fix it you can’t 

You complete and utter dicks!

I’ve spoken to OFFCOM

About my complaint

And drafted a letter 

That clearly states

What berk’s you are

What incompetent buffoons!

To allow me to be slammed

Then rub salt in my wounds!

By making me pay

For the service I haven’t got

It’s laughable really

But I kid you not

So the saga continues:

I’m disconnected still

Hope you enjoyed the sequel

But to live I’m losing the will 😡

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