You fill the bowl

To wash the pots

You make sure the water

Is scorching hot

Plenty of fairy

To cut through the gunge

Then into the deep

Do your marigolds plunge

But in a split second

You cry out in pain

A blood curdling scream

There’s a fucking hole in them again!

Your fingers are singed

You jump up and down

Wrestling with the rubber

Dragging it down

Over your arms

As fast as you can

Revealing the blisters

All over your hands

How on earth

Did these marigolds go

And foil me again

By acquiring a hole?

They’re bloody brand new

Only worn them once!

Yet somehow they’re torn

And my digits are toast

Why does this happen?

Is there no God?

Invent some fucking rubber

Immune to the prod

Of a mystery hole punch

That wins every time

Incinerating my poor fingers

As I try to remove grime!

Surely there’s an answer

An invention that isn’t shit?

Maybe I should purchase

A puncture repair kit 🤔