Taxing Taxes

Tax doesn’t have to be taxing

When you’re organised

But if you’re like me and disorderly

You might find your brain gets fried

When you’re drowning in receipts

And you’re losing sleep

When you’re statements aren’t there

So you’re tearing out your hair

When the dates are a mess

And you need to do your best

To file them chronologically

But you don’t think logically

When you wear a million hats

How do you claim for that?

Along with the day job

You’re a Jack Of All Trades – oh God!

The poor mind boggles

And the floor can’t be seen

It’s buried under paperwork

The poor bloody trees!

If I was paperless

Would I be less stressed?

Should I fork out for Quick Books?

Would then I more give a f**k?

About maintaining my accounts?

All year round?

If I did them monthly

Would I be less grumpy?

Then I ventured to the Post Office

In need of a break

The deadline is looming

Only a fine at stake!

I wondered if I bought

Some kind of box

To store my receipts

I’d feel less lost?

A special tin

To put them in

All neat and tidy

But I was undecided

Then I found a folder

With loads of pockets

A concertina thing

And it really rocked it!

All colours of the rainbow

Were the slots

With monthly little labels

And it didn’t cost a lot

Besides not to worry

About the price

I can expense that

Which is ever so nice!

So I bought the thing

Then an old lady cried

“Oooh, where was that?”

And I pointed to the side

Of the stand

Next to the till

“It’s got loads of pockets,

I think it’s brill,

I’m doing my taxes

Always last minute!”

The old lady laughed:

“I know! Me too! Innit!”

And so we had a chuckle

A happy interlude

To break the monotony

Of the Tax Return Blues.

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