Peeling back the layers
Wondering who I am
Evaluating everything
Ascertaining what is a sham
Digging deep within
Listening to the call of my soul
It’s screaming at me to do something
Yet what I don’t actually know
Clearly I’ve been exasperated
Entrapped by circumstance
Literally dying to free myself
Given half a chance
The road ahead is uncertain
Not sure which direction to take
But treading water isn’t working
And I feel it’s make or break
If I stagnate I’ll surely go mad
I’m already borderline there
Monumentally overburdened
Not of myself taking care
But rather soldiering on
Like a snow plough through a blizzard
Churning through great walls of ice
In dire need of a Wizard
Who’ll wave a magic wand
And make all my dreams come true
So that I can find respite
From what I’ve been putting myself through
For nobody made me
Make the choices I made
Though some perhaps influenced
The fact that I’ve stayed
For so long
In an ill-fitting place
Climbing a mountain
Too vast to negotiate
Trying to stay afloat
On an infinite, untamed ocean
That tosses me this way and that
And is constantly in motion
Clinging on for dear life
To the raft that I commandeered
Terrified of the water
Which never before have I feared
I used to just take the plunge
Without ever thinking twice
Run and jump just like that!
Almost taking flight
I saw it as an adventure
A thrilling dip on this rollercoaster ride
Exhilarating though my heart was in my mouth
No intention of suicide
But that was when I was young
And fearless and naive
That was when I had the balls
And unlimited energy
Older now
I proceed with caution
Wary of pitfalls
Intuition distorted
Having had my faith shaken
I almost struggle to trust
But they’re urging me onwards
And I must be robust
For if I don’t do
What I know I must
They’ll force me somehow
And that could be tough
Best it’s my decision
To make that change
Take that chance
And not hesitate
Best I follow
My heart and my head
Which now are in tandem
I just need the strength
To board that Chariot
And take the reigns
Steer my course
And not remain
In this situation
I’ve found myself in
It’s time to say adieu
And begin again
Start from scratch
For this cycle has almost played out
As confirmed by The World card
Which has left me in no doubt.